Family is Everything!

What a wonderful week it has been. I got to spend an entire week in God's country (Arizona
White Mountains) surrounded by incredible nature, camping in the woods, eating camp cooked
meals, sitting around a campfire, avoiding possible permanent scarring from children armed with
"red hot" marshmallow sticks, singing, laughing and reveling above all in the family I have and belong to.

First of all, Sheri is happiest when she is in the mountains. She loves the smell of Ponderosa Pines. She stops at every floral variation, she takes joy in every rainbow, she will climb mountains, wade through ice cold, bone chilling waters to find "her" meadow she is convinced is one of God's favorite places on Earth. And throughout all the adventures she gives credit to God for His wonders, his creations and for allowing us to enjoy it. She is closest to the heavens when she is in the wilderness. And for me, it's just fun to watch her enjoy it so much. Before I know it, her wonder and awe starts to wear off on me as I look around and try to take it all in.

There is nothing like a rousing game of Frisbee golf  in the woods. Especially when it involves friendly, yet serious competition between the guys. I've noticed throughout all the years, not one single wife, mother or sister has ever played (the little gal in the photo just wanted to be with her Daddy). Far too much banter, trash talk and laughter when you're opponent hits tree after tree. It doesn't seem civilized somehow to the ladies, but completely normal to the guys.

One evening, I decided to stand back outside the fire ring that organically forms on a nightly basis. It begins with one of the men who decides to start a fire, when out of no where all the little boys show up and want to contribute. It then goes to the jockeying of our chairs, finding the comfortable spot away from the smoke. We then have the traditional and dangerous marshmallow ritual. Why we freely give to tiny children wooden dowels with metal sticks attached and allow them to negotiate them on their own in a fire is beyond me. Whats' even more amazing is the idea no one was injured again this year. It seems what's even more fun than the marshmallow smores, is poking that metal stick into the fire until it gets red hot...come to think about it I usually "stand back" throughout this process.  Once everyone is settled and Uncle Dale pulls out the guitar, inhibitions seem to simply disappear. Songs are sung, solos are performed, stories are told, skits are done and there doesn't seem to be a care in the world.

On that evening as I observed, I was amazed at what I belong to and what I was witnessing. Then something incredibly spontaneous occurred that sobered me to the core. Amy, an incredibly capable adult when it comes to children asked a simple question; "What did you learn this year?"  Seemingly a simple question. When one of the grandchildren shared a story of simple faith regarding the protecting power of the Holy Spirit. She had learned the Gift of the Holy Ghost is real, and it does means something significant to her. Then another child chimes in and relates a similar story, and then another and another. I watched as the parents wisely and proudly listened. The expressions on their faces were priceless. I thought as I'm sure they did, they could never have conjured, forced or stimulated that response from their child. But sitting around a campfire, feeling safe, all inhibitions having vanished, priceless stories were told and all were edified.

My thought; where else does this happen? I would be hard pressed to believe anywhere! When family, warmed by love, common objectives, unique perspectives, togetherness, acceptance and gospel principles come together amazing things happen.  Lives are changed, love is strengthened, bonds are deepened and life is great! Family is everything! I'm so glad my life has included this seemingly indispensable element. I can't imagine trying to negotiate the challenges of life without it and I have my mother to thank, my magnificent wife, my children and the extended loved ones I deeply cherish.

I have been taught for some time this thought or concept.  In my core beliefs the phrase is "by simple and small things are great things brought to pass; and small means in many instances doth confound the wise."

As I reflect upon my life in gaining a better understanding of "anxiously engaging;" I can see there have been many people who through simple means, small acts, seemingly routine gestures left indelible impressions for good upon my life.  There are far too many to recall or relate.

Aesop stated, "No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted."  I hope and believe there is actually more to that.  I sense that every act of kindness, no matter how small, if acted upon or even simply acknowledged grows in scope and impact...exponentially.  I think all of us have seen those circumstances when a simple act of charity (love) or kindness takes on a life of it's own.  So much so, in time we look in amazement at what occurred from what seemed like the mere movement of butterfly wings (figuratively speaking).  Then as the song suggests, "one voice singing in the darkness, singing so they hear what's on you mind and when you look around you'll find there's more than one voice, singing in the darkness." (OK it is a Barry Manilow song, but you can't argue with the thought...right?)

Unfortunately if the law of opposition is true, and it is, it's actually the seemingly harmless cumulative acts of evil, violence, neglect or apathy which leads to alarming levels of human suffering.  We see the horrid acts inflicted upon mankind, yet if we distill even these down, I assert we will find they started out simply or small enough.  Caution leads us to seriously reflect before committing an act we claim doesn't hurt anyone, even if it's only me.

What's in all this that has to do with life?  My life, your life, no matter how insignificant we may falsely suppose can have a huge impact on others.  I feel we have an obligation independent of religion, politics or any other social influence to avail ourselves to the simple acts, quiet gestures, anonymous opportunities of "ordinary folk" to lift another person to a higher plain, even if it's only slightly higher.  Then in most cases we can stand back and watch it grow.

The title to my blog is of great importance to me.  It is a clear statement I hope defines my attitude and actions towards life.

The word "anxiously" is not thought of in the typical definition "full of mental distress and uneasiness."  But squarely on the definition "earnestness, earnestly desirous or eager."

The word "engaged" for the purposes of this blog is defined as "pledged, involved, under engagement, entered into."  Hoping to give the impression of deeply focused on, wholly invested, thoroughly involved.

There is a phrase in my core beliefs (Mormonism) that we should "be anxiously engaged in a good cause."  I cannot think of a better cause than this God-given life we are all "engaged" in.  Yet some of us choose to be "anxious" in life (using the typical definition now).  My hope through this blog is to communicate to my children, or anyone who has any remote interest, that the depth of our engagement significantly determines the breadth of our joy.

Years and years ago, as a very young man I was visiting the home of my Aunt and Uncle in Indianapolis. Nelson & Diane Steele.  My Uncle was an avid runner who participated in numerous marathons throughout the country.  I recall in their family room at home, a plaque he received for one of the significant marathons he ran (Boston I believe).  On that plaque was a quote that to this day stirs my soul.  I copied it word for word way back then and have carried it close with me for decades...


“It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat.” 

― Theodore Roosevelt

For this first post, I feel it is important to point out the photo I have attached to the title.  They are the cause of life I am most engaged in...family.  The five grandchildren together with my sweet wife are representative of the five great children we have.  I marvel at the goodness of God in blessing me with the family I have.  I can think of no greater contribution to life.  I know at times we feel we will be wholly judged on what we do in life, but I'm certain what will significantly weigh in on the final tally will be what we left behind in this life.